If you’ve been following me along my journey of motherhood the past 18 months then you probably know that I’m a HUGE advocate for Moms on Call. I did a full blog post last year when Remy was 5 months old about their books, and how much we loved their schedule, etc. You can read it here. Needless to say, having a baby that started sleeping through the night at 10 weeks had me sold!
Once Remy turned 16 months we started following the Moms on Call Toddler book. This specific book focuses on everything going on in the toddler world of parenting, from tantrums to potty training and everything in between.
When I first opened the book, I immediately flipped to the section on discipline because Remy was already starting to show defiant behavior. Remy, for whatever reason, loves throwing his food on the floor. Whether it’s to feed Reynolds, or because he’s done eating. These were questions I wanted help with, and how to correct the behavior.
Moms on Call outlines something called “Simmer Time”, which is similar to “Time Out”, but different in how it works. We started implementing “Simmer Time”, but I was still seeing this behavior from time to time, and couldn’t understand why. I was tired of vacuuming the floor after every meal, and needed something to change. I spent a little bit of time looking through the Moms on Call book, and reading about the different techniques. Then I learned about the Moms on Call online Toddler Course.
So, last week Justin and I sat down and went through this course together. There are 27 videos in total. They range from 2 minutes in time to about 10 minutes. The course is led by co-author of the books, Jennifer Walker, RN BSN. I’ve had the privilege of seeing her speak at a Moms Group that I am in (they are actually local to Atlanta), and she is not only amazing to listen to, but also hilarious.
There are so many things that we learned through watching these courses. However, the most interesting and eye opening portion was on the SMART Paradigm. This stands for Social, Movement, An Engineer, Rule Follower and Touch. Jennifer outlined what a child who is most like one of these would be like. We immediately knew that Remy was a Movement kid. We kept looking at each other and saying “that’s Remy”. “Yup, Remy 100% does that”. He is into everything. He doesn’t sit still for more than a couple of seconds. He is constantly chasing our Goldendoodle, Reynolds. He has SO much energy right before bedtime. I could go on and on. Remy also has traits of the other categories, such as Touch. He loves being held. He has to always be touching you. If he’s eating he likes you right next to him (sometimes with a foot touching you, or propped up on your leg if you’re across from his highchair). He loves standing and just leaning ever so slightly against me so that we’re touching. It’s the sweetest ever, but don’t get me wrong, I have gotten bitten once or twice. Something that’s on the flip side of actions of a Touch child.
This was an “ah ha” moment for us. I finally understood why Remy was throwing his food. He was trying to tell me he was finished. He knows the sign language for “all done”, but he was doing it and kind of throwing his food at the same time in frustration. I realized that Remy, like other Movement kids, hates being confined for a long period of time. You have a short window to get them fed (about 5-10 minutes). I was putting too much food in front of him, and I was putting him in the highchair while I was preparing his food, which meant he was sitting in his confined seat for 5 minutes before the food was even in front of him. Taking away 5 minutes of eating time. We’ve already started making these changes, and are seeing a difference.
At the end of the courses, Jennifer & Laura really dive deeper into the Toddler By Design theory, and the SMART paradigm. They give real examples of how to interact with these kids during tantrums, potty training, etc. Although one characteristic is typically dominant, all children have a combination of these primary designs.
I could go on and on about everything that I’ve learned from Laura & Jennifer over the past 18 months, and especially in these Toddler courses. Most importantly I learned that Remy’s actions were normal, and that I was a wonderful mother who just needed to make some adjustments, so that I could better communicate with him. Moms on Call is currently offering 40% off of the Toddler Courses with code MOC40. They don’t typically offer discounts, but in light of everything going on with COVID-19, they wanted parents to be able to utilize the extra time at home to be more confident and practice these techniques while at home.
I hope that you found this post to be helpful, and I’m happy to answer any questions. While I am definitely not a Doctor or Nurse, and not trained to give health and safety advice, I still get questions from my original post, and enjoy helping as much as I can about the MOC sleep schedule, feeding, etc. I truly love helping y’all – we’re all in this together.
Thank you to the wonderful ladies of Moms on Call for sponsoring today’s post.
Photos by KVC Photography.
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